Every one of us has our own experiences with our fathers, and Alia Bhatt recently offered a lighthearted glimpse into her relationship with her dad, Mahesh Bhatt. When questioned about a particular annoying habit of the renowned filmmaker, the actress remarked, “Engaging in a smooth and easy conversation can be quite challenging when he forgets who he’s talking to and refers to me as Shaheen, sometimes Soni, and occasionally other names I’ve never heard before. He does this with everyone. However, amusingly, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, as I’ve started doing the same thing. So, what’s frustrating is that I’ve adopted this quirk.”
Dr. Rimpa Sarkar, a clinical psychologist and the founder of Sentier Wellness in Mumbai, explains that children often mimic their parents’ quirks through observation and imitation. “Parents serve as a child’s primary and most consistent behavioral templates, so children absorb not just verbal communication but also how parents deal with stress, express emotions, and organize their lives. With repetition, these behaviors become familiar and instinctive, allowing children to replicate them without consciously deciding whether they approve,” she tells indianexpress.com.
Dr. Sarkar notes that there is a notable difference between recognizing a negative behavior and being able to alter it. “A child might think, ‘I dislike when my parent does this,’ yet still adopt the same behavior because it has become ingrained in their actions,” she explains. She adds that some behaviors can be reinforced indirectly, even when the child is aware of their irritability or undesirability.
If a certain habit aids the parent in managing anxiety, exerting control, avoiding confrontation, or achieving a desired outcome, Dr. Sarkar indicates that the child may learn to see the usefulness of the behavior despite disliking its appearance.
As children mature, they become more adept at recognizing these behavioral patterns and can consciously decide which habits to keep and which to discard. This is why adults sometimes find themselves using a phrase, reacting in a specific way, or adopting a habit that mirrors that of their parents.
“We inherit many behavioral tendencies through consistent exposure, but developing awareness provides us with the chance to modify these patterns instead of merely replicating them,” Dr. Sarkar concludes.
