On a Friday evening in Tokyo, six participants, three men and three women, gather at a local venue, united by a commonality they will soon discover. Seated in booths, they are about to be paired off for 15-minute introductions.
“Let’s kick things off with a warm greeting and a smile,” encourages the event host.
When they engage with each other, only their first names will be used, as they share the same surname. This gathering is the first in a series designed to navigate Japan’s contentious law that prohibits married couples from keeping separate last names by bringing together individuals who share a surname.
After verifying their identities through an app, the atmosphere lightens as conversations begin and drinks are served. Following the first round of introductions, the men rotate tables. Laughter erupts from one group, signaling a positive interaction, while another couple helps themselves to refreshments provided by sponsors bearing the same surname: Suzuki.
Future events are planned for other common surnames, including Ito, Tanaka, and Sato, which rank among Japan’s most prevalent family names.
“Honestly, I’m not particularly attached to my maiden name, but I thought it would be enjoyable to meet another Suzuki,” remarks Hana Suzuki, a 34-year-old nurse.
Under Japan’s civil code, it is mandatory for married couples to share a surname. Though couples can choose which name to adopt upon marriage, nearly 95% of the time, it is the woman who changes her name, which critics argue reflects the country’s patriarchal values.
Many women continue to use their maiden names professionally while adopting their married names for legal documents. Even though the government allows birth names to be listed alongside married names on passports and driving licenses, Japan remains unique in its requirement for spouses to share the same surname.
The United Nations committee focused on eliminating discrimination against women has urged the Japanese government to revise these laws and consider a dual-surname option.
Businesses are also advocating for change, claiming that the current laws hinder Japanese companies operating internationally when female employees have IDs that do not match their surnames.
The influential business organization Keidanren has gathered testimonies from women who assert that the surname requirement has negatively impacted their careers, including academics whose work is not recognized due to name discrepancies and female managers whose business names have been rejected in contract situations.
A survey conducted by Keidanren revealed that 82% of female executives supported the option for married couples to maintain separate surnames.
“We initiated this project to shed light on a growing concern in Japan, as many individuals hesitate to marry due to the pressure to change their surname,” stated Yuka Maruyama, a creative planner and the driving force behind the event. “Our aim was to present a light-hearted concept—connecting people who already share the same name—to make this issue more visible and relatable.”
Despite ongoing discussions, successive Liberal Democratic governments have resisted changes to the law, with conservative members arguing that altering the civil code, established in the late 19th century, would threaten traditional family structures and create confusion for children.
“Retaining my maiden name isn’t crucial for me, but I can understand the complications that might arise from adopting my husband’s name, especially in a professional setting,” shares Hana, one of the event’s attendees. “I’m open to the idea of separate surnames, but I do see potential challenges when it comes to naming children… which surname would they inherit?”
A recent survey of 2,500 individuals in their 20s and 30s using the dating app Pairs indicated that 36.6% of women and 46.6% of men were hesitant about changing their surnames, while a smaller percentage expressed concerns regarding their partner’s name change. Just over 7% stated they would consider ending a relationship if neither party was willing to change their surname.
Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi has shown little inclination to alter the existing laws. Instead, she supports a bill aimed at expanding the legal acknowledgment of birth names in official documents—a compromise that critics argue fails to resolve the confusion women experience when dealing with two names.
Takaichi took her husband’s surname, Yamamoto, during her first marriage, which ended in 2017. Upon remarrying in 2021, he adopted her surname, Takaichi. The conservative leader recently told lawmakers that she opposes the introduction of optional separate surnames, advocating instead for the use of birth names in certain contexts, emphasizing the importance of families sharing the same surname on official records.
The event organizers respect the privacy of the participants and do not follow up with couples post-event. However, some attendees seem content with their experience.
“I’ve attended matchmaking events before, but this one felt more intriguing,” shares Taisho Suzuki, a 33-year-old company employee. “I hadn’t considered marrying another Suzuki until now, but it does seem like a safe choice. I don’t want to relinquish my surname, and I know many women feel similarly.”
He and his female partner have used their shared surname as an icebreaker, laughing about the times they were called in government offices, prompting responses from multiple individuals before the introduction of numbered tickets.
“Now that I’m in my 30s, my priorities have shifted, and I’m looking to marry and start a family,” he reflects. “If I meet a woman with an uncommon surname, I’d understand her desire to keep it. We would need to discuss and find a solution together.”
Note: Names have been altered for privacy reasons.
