Vivek Dahiya, 41, recently shared his initial reaction upon discovering that his wife, Divyanka Tripathi, was expecting a child. He described experiencing a slight panic attack, stating, “Even though I was mentally prepared, when it actually hits you for the first time, you swallow hard… yes, these matters are complex, but we thought we would let some time pass and let everything unfold naturally. We would get excited eventually, but not right away… so I restrained myself from getting overly excited. However, I am excited now,” he openly expressed on Divyanka’s YouTube channel.
Divyanka, who was present during the conversation, added, “He also held back my eager ‘horses’ for quite a while.”
To delve deeper into Vivek’s candid response to impending parenthood, we consulted a psychological expert.
Delnna Rrajesh, a psychotherapist and life coach, remarked, “It was surprisingly relatable. Not due to any dramatics, but because it was genuine.”
She emphasized that the term “panic” in this situation is often misinterpreted. “It doesn’t necessarily indicate fear or lack of preparation. More often, it signifies awareness—a recognition of responsibility and a subconscious acknowledgment that life is about to undergo irreversible changes. Individuals experiencing this intensity are typically very invested. The core feeling is not ‘I can’t do this,’ but rather ‘I want to do this well,’” explained Delnna.
This highlights the necessity for more authentic discussions about parenthood.
Not everyone experiences immediate joy; some may feel uncertainty, while others may feel overwhelmed or both simultaneously. These feelings do not negate love; instead, they coexist with it.
In public discussions around pregnancy, the prevailing narrative tends to be straightforward—happiness, excitement, and celebration. “However, what often goes unaddressed is that moment when the reality truly sinks in. As Vivek mentioned, ‘jab woh hit karti hai’—the instant when one realizes that life is about to change in a permanent manner. From a psychological and mental health standpoint, this reaction is far more prevalent than we recognize,” Delnna shared.
Major life changes, even those that are longed for, frequently evoke a blend of emotions. The human brain is designed to react not only to threats but also to intense situations. “Becoming a parent represents one of the most significant shifts in identity a person can undergo. In mere moments, the mind starts to grapple with responsibility, uncertainty, long-term commitment, and the subtle pressure to ‘get it right,’” Delnna noted.
This explains why joy and anxiety can coexist. For many, particularly those who are emotionally attuned, the initial response may not solely be excitement; it often involves a moment of internal reflection and adjustment. “When something feels overwhelmingly significant, the mind tends to regulate emotional intensity as a protective measure. This does not imply disconnection or ingratitude; it simply indicates a process of understanding,” Delnna reflected, describing this as emotional pacing.
“The mind typically does not shift instantly from uncertainty to excitement. Instead, it transitions gradually, allowing time for the reality to settle. This is particularly true during life stages that bring irreversible changes. Parenthood is not merely an event; it signifies a transition into an entirely new identity,” Delnna elaborated.
Divyanka’s contribution added another dimension to the conversation. Her remark about Vivek keeping her excitement “in check” underscores a common dynamic within relationships. “Partners often do not share the same emotional responses simultaneously. One partner may feel heightened enthusiasm while the other may approach the situation with caution. From a relationship psychology perspective, this balance can be stabilizing, creating space for both emotional expression and practical adaptation. Healthy relationships do not require perfect emotional mirroring; they thrive on accommodating differences without judgment,” Delnna stated.
This candid perspective serves as a reminder that even during the most joyous times in life, it is perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed. “And perhaps, rather than being concealed, these feelings should be acknowledged and understood,” she concluded.
